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Sunday, July 20, 2008

An Open Letter To Eddie Murphy....

Dear Eddie:

I'm not much for writing these, as a matter of fact, I haven't written one in 7 months. But after viewing "Meet Dave" for over an excruciating and mind boggling hour, I felt it was that time again. I haven't really been a fan of your film or personal life for a very, very long time, but watching this movie made even me feel sorry and sad for you.

While relaying my Meet Dave watching experience and the fact that this film did 5 million in it's opening weekend, a friend of mine suggested that maybe director Brian Robbins has pictures of you and Johnny Gill in a very compromising position. This theory does seem to make a lot of sense; first he directs you in your post Oscar embarrassment "Norbit", then this current insane debacle, and next up the sigh inducing "Thousand Words" in which you are only allowed to say 1,000 words before you die. Which also seems to be the definitive death knell in your career as well.

I've been around Brian Robbins while working at the studio That Will Henceforth Remain Unnamed (TWHRU). He is a very charming guy, granted, but certainly not worth losing the respect of the general public. If he has pictures of you and Johnny, come clean--I promise you'll feel so much better once the heat wears off. If not, please consider 2 things:

A) Getting a restraining order against Brian Robbins

B) Putting this acting thing down for good, and producing some films that will make us care about you again.

I say this with love,


Invisible Woman

17 comments:

blackwomenblowthetrumpet.blogspot.com said...

Hey there!!

Eddie was never an actor.... THAT was the problem... he was a standup comic that the studios wanted to pass off as an actor...

Remember the white comic who constantly does odd things to contort his face....um... he was on the show In Living Color" twenty years ago?

That guy was definitely able to make the leap into acting and has had strong box office for Mask and Liar, Liar...and I forget what else that he has done...

Eddie was funny in "Coming To America"... and he was funny in some scenes of "Trading Places" (like when he sang "Roxannnnnnne!" in the jail cell *LOL*) but he hasn't been funny in any movie since...

Remember when he was in that movie where Jada wore a wig? Lord help....

I don't know if there is any truth to the Johnny Gill thing...

Unfortunately, Eddie has too many kids and too much child support to stop making movies...he can't go back to stand up.... he can't pack any large venues... for now...we have to just let him be a video ...um...vixen on the large screen so he can keep up on his child support.

Poor Eddie....

Lisa

Regina said...

Eddie has funny moments, the problem is he hasn't had a funny moment in a very long time...
At least you still care enough to write him a letter!

clnmike said...

Lol, yeah Dave was pretty bad, but im still holding out hope for him, maybe he just needs to give comedy a break in general. Do some dramatic roles.

madame z said...

Wow. You actually paid to watch Meet Dave??? Brave soul. LOL.

sdg1844 said...

Damn! I've had no interest in Eddie since "Raw" and we know how libg ago that was. It's as bad as I thought it was. Good bye Eddie.

theblackactor.com said...

Er... Eddie who?

SjP said...

hmmmm...can't say I'm surprised. The last movie I saw him in when he wasn't being a comic was Harlem Nights. Really liked that one. Didn't like him in Dream Girls because he seemed to be playing one of his stage or SNL characters. Maybe he should do another 48 hours before the beverly hills cops come to pick him up for up for back child support.

Livia said...

This is off subject because this is my first time visting this sight, but I like your page layout, it has a lot of personality...the topics are cool too.

As for Eddie, as stated before...he is a comedian and not an actor.

Vanessa said...

Oooh, gurl. It's been a while since I've visited and I do apologize for that. I see that you are still off the chain AND on point with your reviews. This ine was priceless.

I didn't see Dave and will not pay to do so. I'll see just how bad it is when it's on cable TV.

In the meantime, I thought about you as soon as I saw the new vintage black cinema stamps. Check them out at http://shop.usps.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?catalogId=10152&storeId=10001&categoryId=21902&productId=39161&langId=-1.


Peace & Love...

d.funkt said...

its possible that a good standup could save his career but other than that? he better pray.

DB said...

that was funny.

how does this guy keep getting money to make these films!

this dudes movies are flat out embarrassing now!

Wonder Man said...

eddie's just hitting a dry spell

Femigog said...

Eddie certainly lost me with that Norbit mess and it seems that he is just taking anything shows up...yuck

jhazzaisworld said...

I went to see that movie, and I still can't figure out WTF that was about. Sorry Eddie, but I would just call it quits if I was you.

www.jhazzaisworld.wordpress.com

Invisible Woman said...

Lisa: I firmly beleive if Eddie didn't work another day in his life he would have enough child support for 10 more children!

@regina: I don't know why, but that movie was juust screaming for mr to say something about the sad state of Eddie's choices

@clnmike: at this point, I think drama is definitely the way to go--I actually think that Eddie has had so much life experience, he would be good at it

@madame z: hell naw I didn't pay for that mess--lol!

@sdg1844: Damn! and I thought I was bad--I'll admit it; I thought Norbit was kinda funny.

Invisible Woman said...

@the black actor: lol!!!

@sjp: 48 Hours would be a travesty--I liked him in Dreamgirls--it was the first time I could almost relate to him in years. I still think he should do more drama.

@livia: welcome :-) thanks for your kind words...Eddie I believe is an actor, he just doesn't care any more. Just like Will Smith who was a rapper, then on a comedy sitcom, and then an action star--Eddie has charisma and talent to be more as well. He should hang out with Will.

@Vanessa: WHAT"S UP GIRL! You must be psychic, cause the same day you left this comment I was thinking about you and your blogs--funny huh? I atually wrote about those stamps a few months ago--your girl was on it :-)

@d.funkt: welcome! and it is more than obvious that child needs massive prayer...

Invisible Woman said...

@db: and I am embarrassed for him, but even more embarrassed to watch them

@wonderman: I think it's a little more than a dry spell after 10 years--it's a full on famine!

@Femigog: where ya been girlie?!!Good to see ya. I agree--he just doesn't give a fugg anymore :-(

@jhazzaisworld: I couldn't agree more. at the end I was like "what the fugg did I just see?"