Questionable....

Some things have come up on my radar for the past couple of weeks, some of them questionable as hayell, some of them just mild what tha?'s. Some of them are a bit late, but I just wanted to put my thoughts out there anyway:

Halle Berry as "Sexiest Woman Alive"? Yes, she is very pretty, yes she has a great body (she really knows how to show the goods), but I have always found her a bit devoid of the sexual vibe. Like I can't imagine her doing the do without worrying about her hair, if she actually does the do at all (did you follow that?). Apparently, Slausnificent agrees with me.

Terrence Howard booted from Ironman for being greedy? HaHA! (doing my best Nelson from the Simpsons). Dude! What were you thinking? Terrence practically sleepwalked his role in that film---I honestly thought they chose him cause the filmmakers were too lazy to think of another Black guy. This was clearly a case of shut the f*ck up and just get paid. Will The Cheadle be any better? I dunno, but he is like 3 feet, 18 inches, so that is not exactly an auspicious start.

OK, we've been hearing for years that Will and Jada have this wonderful stage marriage as gay and lez in wedlock. But can this story about him paying for discreet, ummm..."down-under" sex be real? If so, wow--let the fireworks begin.

ps: these blind items are supposedly, allegedly, about him. questionable indeed: http://www.laineygossip.com/Trailer_Visits.aspx and http://www.laineygossip.com/Trailer_Visits_With_His_Trainer.aspx

Why, why, why, oh why is Beyonce playing Eartha Kitt? Just damn!!! I agree with Clay Cane 100%:

Etta James and now Eartha Kitt are roles that could make a career for an up and coming actress. Also, isn’t it a rule that once an actor plays a real life character in a movie they should be avoiding additional biopics? That would be like Jamie Foxx playing Sammy Davis, Jr. Beyonce has already portrayed Diana Ross (I don't care what ya say, Deena Jones is Diana), Etta James, and now Eartha Kitt. What's next -- Harriet Tubman?

Yes, Beyonce is a great performer, but an actress she is not. Eartha Kitt was a child conceived by rape, born on a cotton plantation in South Carolina, and rose to fame the old fashion way, hard work—while suffering awful sexism and racism. Her career was practically ruined for being an outspoken advocate against the Vietnam War and she allegedly made the First Lady at a White House luncheon in 1968 burst into tears. Nothing about Eartha's life story will Beyonce be able to pull off. Bey doesn't even know how to drop her George W. Bush Texan accent—how is she going to manage Eartha's South Carolina/pseudo-European accent?

Most importantly, there are so many black actresses who could play Eartha Kitt. The depth and history of Eartha could be an Oscar winning role, but in a Beyonce’s performance all you will get is a NAACP nomination. The reality is, no matter how hard this woman tries to be Meryl Streep, and I believe she is trying, I believe she takes acting class with some of the best teachers in the business—mama just doesn’t have "it."

beyonce "emoting" as etta james in cadillac records--the lights are on, but no one's home.....

Was watching some seriously random movies over the weekend. One of them was "Motives 2" (don't judge me!). What was up with that movie? Seriously, this was completely like a Black and English speaking version of a Mexican tele-novela on TeleMundo, from the outfits, to the makeup, to the overly extreme-to-the-max over the top melodramatic situations and acting. Boo.

I also rewatched "Sugar Hill" for the first time since the 90's. Did that movie just seem so much better because of Terrence Blanchard's moody score, or was it actually good? And how could Wesley Snipes look so damn fine in that movie and be a complete and total turn-off today? How does that happen? And what the eff happened to Theresa Randall? (I always hated her hair in every movie). All I know is Clarence Williams III played the hayell out of Wesley's junkie dad character.

I know I talk about some of the limited choices we have in Black Cinema in the states, but elsewhere, it is even more dismal. To wit, this email from reader Aulelia of "Charcoal Ink". Should we be grateful that we even have choices, good or bad?:

Hi IW,

I feel compelled to write to you and let you know that I finally saw the Great Debaters today. I had to resort to downloading it because the bloody film was not released in the UK despite all of my patient waiting.

I am not even surprised that it does not have a European Region 2 DVD release which is deeply frustrating as I had wanted to buy it.

Anyway, I know it came out ages ago for you in the US but just wanted to say that I thought it was brilliant. Loved it. Lol, no surprise as I am obsessed with Denzel but jokes aside, I found it to be quite touching. I knew what to expect plot wise and I did not feel disappointed.

What does make me sad is how black people in the UK are being starved of such rich films like GD. We keep getting absolute SHITE being advertised here (like journey to the centre of the earth) yet films like GD are ignored - why ? - because they have a black cast.

It is shameful and disgusting. Just want let to let you know that the situation for seeing black films in the UK in cinemas is barely alive.

No wonder Idris and his lovely self has found more work in the US. It is a shame but what it is is merely a reflection of reality.

When Acting Reels Go Wrong....

I saw this video before I started this blog, and LMBAO! It is Carl Lewis (yes the Olympic track star) playing a pimp for his acting reel. The first time I saw it, the blogger said (don't remember which one) that Lewis' acting skills seem to consist of repeating back what everybody just said to him. This ish is so hilarious that my friend and I still reference it sometimes. He makes New York from "New York Goes To Hollywood" look like Angela Bassett...bootleg!





thanks to fresh, who reminded me of this mess

Today In B'Days....

Bill Cosby is 71. Damn!



Lisa Nicole Carson says she's 39. Where you and your boobage at girl?!


Here's Bill in one of my favorites of all time--"Uptown Saturday Night". I posted this clip once before, but what can I say? Love it!




Bonus clip: I also loved this hip hop group from back in the day...they were constantly paying homage to everything Black and 70's from Ernie Barnes/"Goodtimes" to the lovable "Uptown Saturday Night" and "Coolie High"---this is one of my very, very, very, very favorite songs of all time...let "luchini fall from the sky!":

Milk Carton Alert!

I couldn't sleep last night, so at 2am I caught an old episode of "New York Undercover". Yes Malik Yoba's lips were semi-ash free then, but in this particular story was Tyrin Turner. What the eff happened to him?

He broke out in "Menace To Society", which, very coincidentally, happens to be on BET tonight. He was in "Panther" and "Belly", then....nothing. I looked up his profile and saw that he had an uncredited role in "How High". Damn, not only are you in "How High", but you are uncredited too? SMH.

All I know is between Malik Yoba's chap and Tyrin's innertube lips, I could barely concentrate on last night's storyline, haha.

All of the clips from Menace were too long, so here is the trailer:

Milk Carton Alert!

While cruising darkbrotha's blog, I came across a post for "The Five Heartbeats". He had a scene from youtube with this dude, which led me to ask: What the eff happened to Michael Wright?

He and his hoarse, froggy voice were a staple in 90's, thanks to films like "The Five Heartbeats" and "Sugar Hill". He always looked rough to me, like he was half a step away from crackdom. I remember very vividly a line he had in some movie where he screamed "The only place you're gonna be is in a body bag!" at the top of his lungs, and remember it sounded like his larynx was gonna explode any second.

I also remember that I used to go to his mother's restaurant in midtown Manhattan, called Jezebel's (before it got all touristy). I liked it cause it had upscale Southern food, and the place was decorated like a beautiful French bordello.

Anyhoo, I went in there one night with a member of a very famous R&B group and an artist whose video I was styling. The video was for a soundtrack for a movie this Wright guy was in, and he happened to be there hanging out that night with his mom and Wesley Snipes. I went over to the table to tell him about the artist and how it was a coincidence that they were there at the same time, on the same night. He thought it was funny too, and got up to walk over when his mother shoved him back down hard and abruptly in his seat. "Let them come over to meet you" she hissed. Like he was the King of France or something! There was complete shock and silence for almost a full minute. It took all of my strength (for business reasons) not to tell her how completely delusional she was....maybe she was his manager, which would explain why his career is nowhere to be seen.

Looking on IMDB I can see he was a reoccurring character on "Oz". I would not know that, cause even tho I have seen every episode of "The Sopranos" and "The Wire", that ish was too gritty for even me, beautiful chocolate men nonwithstanding. He most recently was in some random movie called "Raving" (2007) playing "Security Guard". Not good. Not quite worthy of a milk carton yet, but he is definitely on his way on the express train.

Here is a scene with him in 'The Five Heartbeats" that I saw on darkbrotha's blog:

Even tho this film is corny to the ninth power, it is a perennial community favorite. Why? In my opinion, it is so very uniquely black, a story that can only be told by us and with us, i.e. the Motown phenom. It combined black music, black drama, black comedy, and black issues into a movie that was easy to digest, and easy to watch. In other words, pre-Tyler Perry, and I ain't mad.

Bonus Milk Carton:

More worthy of this post (both from the Five Heartbeats) are Tico Wells :

(this was the most decent pic I could find)

and Troy Beyer:

I know Troy hooked up with Robert Townsend and wrote a couple of movies, most notably "B.A.P.S." and more recently "Love Don't Cost A Thing". But what's up since then? She seems to have fallen into the Rae Dawn Chong realm. And Tico? Complete and utter silence on his career front. Maybe he should have used that big magic third leg my girlfriend said he had (oops, did I say that?). Who knew?

Extra, extra bonus:

Here is the video that I styled, that I just found on youtube looking for "Sugar Hill". Bear in mind that she refused to wear anything I asked her to, and I was only responsible for her leather coat in one scene (her best outfit by the way). If she would have listened to me maybe she'd still be around! haha

Milk Carton Alert!

Thinking of Bill Duke made me think of this one--what the eff happened to Victoria Dillard?

Dillard played the perennial girlfriend in many a black film, most notably "Deep Cover" a community favorite. It's rumored that Laurence Fishburne left his wife for her, then cheated again on Victoria and dropped her for someone else....but I digress.

In the new millennium she has played Betty Shabazz in "Ali" in 2001, and was in a bunch of "Spin City" episodes, which I wouldn't know about, since I never watched. All in all, I think a milkcarton is in dire need here....can't even find a decent picture of her on the net.

For the 3 of you that don't know about the black classic "Deep Cover" the synopsis is this from IMDB:

A black uniformed policeman is recruited by a devious drug enforcement agent to infiltrate a smuggling organization seeking to expand into designer drugs. This 'ugly side of the war on drugs' explores the context of race, identity and hypocrisy within a brutal and alienating investigation.

IW: I prefer to think of it as one of the sexiest movies ever, and it also made half of the black females in the nation fall in love with Jeff Goldblum, haha. Oh yeah, and Snoop was genuinely cool then.

Here is a clip from the movie...why is powder coming out of that dude's chest.....and was he in Full Force?




Here is a scene that I remember the whole theater saying in unison "OH SHIT!" Gangsta.

Milk Carton Alert!

What the eff happened to Taimak (he's 43!) and Julius Carry, aka "Sho'Nuff" (check out his normal picture!) from "The Last Dragon"? I wanted to know, and so did Jon from the positive blog "Chimeric Daydreams".

While Julius Carry has worked steadily in TV (could've fooled me) on shows like "Moesha" and "Half and Half", Taimak has had some spotty B-roles, oddly enough using his real life name coupled with a made up last name for his characters. Weird.

If you're interested, here is his official website, and I think he's singing/talking on it, also weird: http://www.taimak.tv/. Take a look at some exercise DVD tomfoolery he made unleashed on an unsuspecting public:

Damn! Embedding disabled...guess he needs you to buy, but here is the link:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=RmEIbeVYTBs

Apollo Creed and The Negro Justice League....

This review of the classic "Action Jackson" weighs in from one third of the league, Supernegro:

Action Jackson: Breeding Ground of Mediocrity

By all accounts Action Jackson is a bad movie; even if you list the flick as among your bad movie night faves (as I do), the unnecessary boobage, cartoon violence, and unbelievable stunts - such as Carl Weathers outrunning a speeding taxi - pushes this movie from the realm of the action to '80s super-cheese.

Although the movie may have sunk Carl Weathers' shot at a successful solo movie career, Action Jackson was the breeding ground - or is that cesspool? - for developing the careers of a couple of Tinsel Town noobs, while highlighting the veteran ability of others.

[Following are] some of the semi-bigtimers who help funk this stinker up:

Bill Duke

A year after he tore up the jungle hunting an invisible alien in Predator, The Dukester donned a suit and glasses as Captain Armbruster in Action Jackson. While Carl Weathers may have gotten the top billing, Duke's imposing presence and deranged eyes kind of made you hope that he'd reach across his desk and bleed Jackson real quiet and leave him there. But he didn't. Which sucked.

Sharon Stone

Sharon Stone is only good at two things: keeping her non-acting mouth shut and showing her tits. In Action Jackson, she doesn't have many lines and flashes her teets, making for an all-around stellar performance by the future Basic Instinct star. Note: In a typical bout of Hollywood shenanigans to make this movie more palpable to White audiences, Sharon Stone's face engulfs the entire movie poster, totally dwarfing Weathers and Vanity. Note Again: Her character's two-bit, dying half-through the film.

Craig T. Nelson
Craig T. Nelson is known for three things: starring in Poltergeist, starring in Coach, and starring in pure shite between those two ventures. Nelson is Action Jackson's antagonist, a pseudo-mob boss/car manufacturer/kung-fu master (no joke) who controls a squad of ninja-like goon that bump off the heads of other auto-makers. Some would perceive him to be a cold-hearted bastard for clapping his own wife, but considering Sharon Stone's ability, I welcomed by murderous ninja-boss.

Vanity
When I was 13, Vanity was the hottest woman on the planet, at least according to my adolescent penis. But looking back at her at her portrayal of Sydney Ashe, Craig T. Nelson's walking glory hole, drug addict, and singer, I deem her the anti-sexy. Not only is her dialogue stiff, but her dancing looks like what would happen if she simultaneously had a heart attack, stroke, and a seizure. Twinkle toes she ain't.

De'Voreaux White
Although he's best known as Bruce Willis' chauffeur in Die Hard, White had other outstanding roles in his long Hollywood career: he excelled as the crackhead Lucky in Trespass, one of the many nerds in Head of the Class, and in Action Jackson as...as...I've sincerely forgotten which character he was, which speaks volumes in regards to his role selection.

- Jay Wilson

From I.W: I remember a couple of things about this movie....

-It was filmed in my hometown of Oakland, CA. I saw a couple of scenes being shot, and remember Carl Weathers walking around like he was God's gift to creation...I marveled at how he didn't know how ridiculous he looked with eight pounds of orange Fashion Fair pancake make-up and enough eyeliner to make Mary Kay proud.

-I had an associate who bragged to anyone who would listen that she had lunch with Carl on the set, and remember thinking "who gives a f__k?" No haterade involved whatsoever.

And really, what happened to De'Voreaux White? He was kinda weird to me, and the fact that he made out on "Head of the Class" with Richard Pryor's daughter Rain made him even more so (tho he looked like he hated every minute of it). Milk carton alert anyone?

Damn-this was the only picture I could find of him..when he was a kid in "The Blues Brothers". Is he still alive?

Milk Carton Alert

What the eff happened to Stoney Jackson? People have asked that over the years, and it does seem strange that he seemingly disappeared after being a staple of wackness and the jheri curl throughout the 80's. Kinda like Cuba Gooding would've been if he had a TV career. The last time I remember seeing him was in Chris Rock's shaky movie "CB4" as the rapper "Wacky D".

No milk carton needed, tho. It seems that he has worked pretty steadily in B movie heaven in the 90's (why wasn't I aware of this?) and more in television in the new millennium, even appearing on "Everybody Hates Chris" last year. How did I miss that? He seems to have a film that looks like it's going straight to DVD called "4-Bidden" (tagline: 'America's #1 R&B group is about to be rocked!').

Maybe he changed his name to Tony or something, or maybe we don't recognize him without his signature "Soul Glo" hair.

Milk Carton Alert

What the eff happened to Tracy Camilla Johns? After making a bang in "She's Gotta Have It" and about 5 lines and a much talked about scene in "New Jack City" (where her name was Uniqua-?!) she is nowhere to be found....just dust and tumbleweeds. I never really thought she had a face for film, though.

After looking up her profile on IMDB, I see she was in Tone Loc's "Wild Thing" video and "Club Patron" in "Mo' Betta Blues." Damn, did she do something to piss Spike off? Going from a lead in his film to an extra, plus the fact she seems to be completely and thoroughly blacklisted. How do you go from working with Spike and Wesley Snipes to "never to be heard from again"?

If anyone ever needed a milk carton alert, it's her!

Just Missing The Milk Carton....

My blogging buddy Purple Zoe sent this item over to me....this woman just missed being one of my milk carton alerts by 20 minutes, haha. I know I have some Canadian readers, and you might be able to attend this if so inclined....

Rae Dawn's script 'BLUNT' was the WINNER OF THE WILDsound JUNE FEATURE SCREENPLAY EVENT

Her script will be read in its entirety at WILDsound's August 2007 event on Wednesday, August 15 at the National Film Board CINEMA, 150 John Street, in downtown Toronto, Canada at 6:30 pm.

Rae Dawn Chong is an actress, director, producer and writer with a career spanning four decades. Born in Edmonton, Alberta in 1961, she became an actress at age 12, starring in "The Whiz Kid and the Mystery at Riverton" for Disney in 1974. Her first adult role was as the mysterious Ika in "Quest for Fire" in 1981, for which she was awarded a Genie, followed by starring roles in more than fifty movies, including "Beat Street," "Choose Me," "American Flyers," "Commando," "The Color Purple" and "Soul Man."

More recently, she played the role of Dr. Peggy Fowler for two years on the television series "Mysterious Ways," starred in the Canadian series "Wild Card" and acted in the award-winning independent film "The Visit."

She wrote and starred in the film "Boulevard," wrote and directed the award-winning short film "Mary Stigmata," and produced, wrote, and directed the film "Cursed Part 3." As a writer for the screen, Rae Dawn currently has two films and one episodic television series in development. Rae Dawn is the mother of one grown son, recently graduated from Brown University, and currently lives with her boyfriend and two dogs in rural New England.

From I.W.: I should hire a publicist...they can make anyone sound like the queen of England. I'm glad she's doing her thing, but "Cursed Part 3"? Let us elevate a wee bit...

Milk Carton Alert

What the eff happened to Cynda Williams? She seemed like the next big black film star in the 90's, but I haven't seen her since "Introducing Dorothy Dandridge". She was the sexy chanteuse is "Mo' Betta Blues" and played some interesting indie roles, like in "One False Move" (directed by Carl Franklin) then nothing on the radar.

I know that when time passes some actresses can't get work, but Cynda started in a way that her face should still be out there. No milk carton needed here, though....when I peeped her profile on IMDB, she has worked quite consistently, though you coulda fooled me. She now seems to reside in B and C movie heaven.

Milk Carton Alert

What the eff happened to Jim Kelly? He was the first (and only, to my knowledge) black superdude/martial arts expert. And he was a real one, not a Hollywood one, having won a multitude of martial arts awards. He barely said a word in his films (which I guess was the far Eastern way), but always put foot to ass. This is his online mini-bio:

With his funky Afro hairstyle, super cool attitude and superb karate skills, Jim Kelly was instantly identifiable, and one of the top martial arts film stars of the early 1970s. After appearing in a minor film role, Kelly's second screen effort was as one of the invited guests to the deadly Han's Island in Enter the Dragon (1973). Kelly quickly cropped up in several more martial arts influenced "blaxploitation" films including Three the Hard Way (1974), Golden Needles (1974) and Black Belt Jones (1974).

I.W.: For some reason this guy would remind me of Lenny Kravitz. Who knew he was born a simple country boy from Paris, Kentucky? I used to have "Black Belt Jones" on VHS. It was a ridiculous movie, kinda like a ghetto "In Like Flint", so I never watched it, but I had a collection of black films stacked on a shelf, and it was good to have a copy. I did love it when he teamed up with Jim Brown and Fred Williamson, especially in "Three the Hard Way". The last film credit he had was one in the 90's as "Executive #4". Not good. I think a milk carton is needed here, stat.

Milk Carton Alert

What the eff happened to The Hughes Brothers? justjudith (check out her blog) not only leaves great comments, she brought up this great question as well.

To tell the truth, I had forgotten about co-directors the Hughes Brothers (Allen and Albert), which is weird, cause they were boiling hot in the 90's. Some of their movies are black film staples; Menace II Society, Dead Presidents, American Pimp, all made while still in their 20's. They had the best gimmick of being twins, and had a huge amount of charisma. I used to see them around, and even if you didn't know who they were, you could tell they were doing something big.

They made the Jack The Ripper/Johnny Depp film "From Hell" that was hugely anticipated, then just as hugely thrashed. I loved it though; it was an interesting take on the Jack the Ripper genre, and was one of the most visually arresting films I can think of to this date. After that they seemed to have fallen off the face of the earth.

No milk carton necessary here, though. After a quick look at IMDB I see the brothers have been working it out in television. After "From Hell" I can only imagine that their disgust with the Hollywood System far and away surpassed mine. I hope they come back.

Milk Carton Alert

What the eff happened to Leon Isaac Kennedy? Dude was large in the 80's, the era of the lightskin-ded, "good hair" dudes. He was famous for playing Too Sweet in Penitentiary One, Two, and Three (a true thespian, as you can tell) but hasn't made a movie since 1987 (Penitentiary 3). At first I thought he might be dead from crack (he seemed like that type), but when I looked him up, he did a commentary on a Jim Brown film in 2000.

All I really remember about Leon are isolated, suspect things. I remember he walked around like that negro you know who thinks he's God's gift, but doesn't know how ridiculous he is. I remember how he ran one of the most beautiful women in the world (albeit not very bright) Jayne Kennedy, into the ground. And all I remember from those Oscar caliber Penitentiary movies was one scene. Ernie Hudson, with missing teeth (?!) played this character called Half-Dead in one of them. He got mad at his girlfriend and smashed and smeared potato salad all into her face, then proceeded to lick it off and have sex with her. Even though I was pretty young at the time, I knew there was something very wrong with that, to say the least....put Leon on a milk carton!